Let's make one thing very clear: I act only in the interests of Cronk Corp and our shareholders. I'm sorry if that breaks your heart, but I really don't care. At Cronk Corp we have many products and brands, but what started it all out was the Cronk(tm). The Cronk works wonders on all your cronking needs. The only problem is I have this nosy journalist, Kloo, who's claiming if you happen to crunk with a Cronk you crink (die). Sure it's the truth, but why does the whole world gotta know that?